Some of us are are born with an unfortunate affliction that causes us to semi-scowl whenever our faces are at a state of rest. It is not a look, mind you, its just how our features were placed since conception. I have never thought of a name for it, and then one day through a a dear friend from Rochester, New York who showed me an entry on Thought Catalog, I not only learned a name for this affliction but also how to deal with it.
It helps that now I can talk about my Resting Bitchface Syndrome in a good humoured way and let the goodness within slowly shine through, but that doesn’t mean that my woes are overcome.
Today, while having a green tea latte in Starbucks, Abby caught me staring at a girl’s shoes (she snidely insists that I wasn’t looking at her shoes, but I’m a guy, I’m really into shoes, you know?). Afterwards, I looked at another girl carrying roses of assorted colours packed stalk by stalk in clear cellophane. Probably for sale, I thought.
At this point, Abby looked up from her Mac and, because she had her ears stuffed with miniature speakers, mouthed some words to me. I am no Jason Bourne, so i had her repeat herself. She did and it turns out, she was asking me
A: ‘What are you doing?’
B: ‘What do you mean what am I doing?’
A: Plucking out the speakers from her ears ‘You’re doing this!’ *makes scrunched up scowl face
B: Oh. Shit. I was doing that? I was looking at flowers! damn.
This is terrible. I was looking at flowers for crying out loud. What was I doing scowlooking (word credit to Abby for coining it) at flowers?
The usual suggestions of ‘you ought to smile more’ and ‘try to think happy thoughts’ always come to mind, but sometimes the mind is just absorbing what the eyes are seeing, and the face is relaxed. The resultant bitchface is not intentional!
Is there an app for this yet?
- The Overthinker’s Guide To Resting Bitchface Syndrome (thoughtcatalog.com)
- Tips For Battling B****face (bellasugar.com)